Is there a wound? – Part 1

Is there a wound? – Part 1

One of the things we help guys with that come through Refuge is, we try to help them pinpoint childhood wounds. Normally a child is going to receive some type of wound from their parents. Nine out of ten times the child doesn’t even know he or she has been hurt. We are born into relationships, and a break in the relationship occurs when something is said to us which causes an emotional wound or when something is done to us. Some examples are, rejection, abandonment, any type of abuse (Physical, Mental, Sexual). All of these are major breaks, and normally a child tries and bridge back to the parent for their need of love, acceptance, worth/approval and security, but often the bridge doesn’t get fixed by the one that broke it. If the one who broke the bridge asks forgiveness from the child, shows love etc., the bridge is repaired. If the bridge is not repaired the break causes guilt, shame, anger, and fear. With all wounds comes pain, and either the child or now the adult is dealing with pain due to a wound they received. The only person that can heal that wound now is Jesus, but many people turn to other things to try and deal with the hurting and pain. This is what happened in my life, porn became my drug to help deal with the pain, but it only caused more pain. It wasn’t until I fully believed that Jesus could and would heal me of my wounds that I started to have freedom over my sin. I received a lot of wounds growing up, and Jesus is healing them. One of the things that I do now with my son is, I will ask him, “has daddy done anything to hurt you or make you up set?” I want to make sure I have not left a wound. There is also many of times that I have to ask for his forgiveness because I got to upset with him. I want to make sure I keep that bridge intact. As parents we have to sit down with our kids and ask them some tough questions about ourselves about what we have done. We may not like what they tell us, but it’s better than them not telling us and they grow up hurting and suffering in the future for something we could have fixed.

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