Archive for April, 2016

The Wound – Part 1

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Our struggles, no matter what they are, is a symptom of a much deeper issue going on in our hearts.  I am a sex addict in recovery.  I struggled with my issue for over 20 years.  Before I started to gain real freedom from my addiction I was trying to cut off the struggle its self.  I read book after book trying to find some secret formula to rid myself of my struggle.  It wasn’t until I started to learn that my struggle with purity came out of emotional wounds that the Lord had to heal.

Emotional wounds I have discovered are similar to chronic physical wounds. I was talking to a friend recently who works at a wound care center. She mentioned that often patients with chronic wounds come into the center with a wound that has nearly closed and is covered over with a scab on the outside but there is still a deep, unhealed wound beneath the surface. When this happens with a physical wound, the doctor must take a scalpel (a sharp blade) and re-open the wound on the outside so that it can actually heal….from the inside out.

The same is true with our emotional wounds….if we have tried to close them on the outside without properly addressing the need for wound healing on the inside, we have left ourselves open to a festering chronic wound….that is likely causing us internal pain and becoming infectious.

And just like the chronic physical wounds, it is painful to re-open these emotional wounds and cut away the outside layer of “protection” we have constructed to protect ourselves from further pain and injury. However, if we refuse to go through this painful healing process, we are allowing anger, bitterness, unforgiveness, and resentment to fester and develop a foothold in our souls. When this happens we will continue to go to our “symptom” to numb our pain.

So just like with the chronic physical wounds, although a painful process it is so worth it to work through the emotions and get to the root of the emotional wound so that real healing can occur.

My friend was sharing that often this physical process takes several weeks with the patient having to return to the wound care clinic every week so the doctor can cut away the callus or scab that keeps trying to grow back preventing the wound from healing on the inside. Also, she mentioned that the once the wound finally heals completely from the inside out, the new scar tissue is only 80% of the original uninjured tissue’s strength. Patients are taught to protect the fragile, newly healed tissue to prevent re-injury. We have to allow the Lord to heal our deep emotional wounds. This also reminded me of the importance of knowing our weak spots….being aware of where the enemy has wounded us in the past so that we can be alert and on our guard against getting wounded in the same area again.

 

 

God Never Stops

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In our journey of healing (which is a life long journey) God never stops molding us and shaping up to be more like Him.  I have been walking on my journey of healing for a few years now, only for the Lord to remind me that I am not there yet.  Often for the Lord to get my attention He leads me into a difficult trail where there is often a good amount of pain associated with the trial.  Please don’t think pain is a bad thing.  God uses pain to bring about our healing.  The greatest example of this is the cross.  The last few weeks God has been allowing me to experience a pain full trail which came to ahead yesterday.  I had been fighting against it for a while because I didn’t want to deal with it.  This morning the Lord in His kind and gentle way reminded me that He is incomplete control of my life, and that I don’t fully trust Him of this. Romans 8:28 says, “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” Everything the Lord allows us to go through is for our good.  God has our best interested in mind.  We really have to come to a place to believe this and trust this truth from Romans 8. It’s not easy because the enemy is screaming lies that God does not have our best interested in mind, and if God cared He would not let me go through the pain I am experiencing. I am glad God never stops transforming us and that He loves us enough to continue to transform us.  We have trails because God is preparing us for something better.

 

Little Talks = Big Conversations

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Parents, how often are you focusing in on the little talks you have with your children? It’s our little talks we have with our children that lead to big conversations.  These little talks often occur at different times of the day with each being at a different places in our day to day schedules.  I am always looking for an opportunity to get in a short little talk in with my son about different life subjects: marriage, purity, God, loving others, leadership, and the list goes on and on.  As parents we have to be looking for opportunities to be speaking to our children about this topics because if we are not talking to them others are.  I want to make sure my voice is the one my son hears often and the loudest.  These little talks will lead to big conversations because more than likely our children will ask a follow up question about something we talked about and that is going to open the door for a good long conversation.  I have been able to have little talks with my son about marriage.  One night when I went to put him to bed he asked me a question about marriage.  This opened the door for us to have a big conversation.  I was able to have a deep conversation about how God formed marriage, purity in marriage, and he just kept asking questions which kept the conversation going. It was a good talk.  The reason it was such a good talk was we had been talking about this and he felt comfortable.  By having these little talks with our children, and starting the younger they are the better, it gets them used to talking about certain subjects.  When they are ready to have a longer conversation it just natural to talk with you because you have already talked about whatever it is they want to talk about.  Keep your eyes open for opportunities to have little talks with your children so when they are ready you will be able to have a good long conversation and once you start having these type of conversations they won’t end.

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